The question of what makes a healthy couple has been the topic of much research, writing, and theorizing.
Through her years of experience as a few therapists, Dr. Ellen Wachtel has come up with the seven qualities that she believes bring the type of relationship we all strive for or wish we had.
The following seven tips are adapted from Wachtel’s book, the guts of Couple Therapy: Knowing What to try to and the way to try to Do It.
Tip #1: Aim to form your partner feel good about themselves.
It’s not the responsibility of 1 partner to create up the other’s low self-esteem or lack of self-worth, except for those with a generally healthy sense of self it’s important to interact in behaviors that build each other up.
Being mindful of how often you’re criticizing your partner, and aiming instead to interact in positive reinforcement and authentic compliments can go an extended way.
Criticism is probably going to slide out every so often, but it shouldn’t be the dominant sort of feedback you’re giving or receiving.
Tip #2: Do things together that you simply genuinely enjoy.
While “date nights” are popularly offered as a tip for struggling couples, Wachtel says the pressure and obligation of forced time together hebdomadally can zap the fun out of what’s meant to be enjoyable.